Healing a Relationship Los Gatos CA

If you want to learn how to save a relationship but feel powerless to change things, you must learn exactly what to do and what not to do in order to increase your odds of a successful reunion. Accepting that this is happening is the first step towards healing. Whatever you resist, persists.

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Healing a Relationship

How To Save A Relationship

Author: Matt Olson

Going through a break up is one of the most traumatic experiences you can go through, especially if the two of you were very close at one time. This may sound overly dramatic, but it's a proven fact that losing a relationship creates a similar degree of grief as losing a loved one who dies. The pain is overwhelming at times. How many more sleepless nights can you take? Is there something you can do to repair the relationship? If you want to learn how to save a relationship but feel powerless to change things, you must learn exactly what to do and what not to do in order to increase your odds of a successful reunion.


Accepting that this is happening is the first step towards healing. Whatever you resist, persists. Accept that you are going to go through a certain degree of emotional pain instead of fighting it. You will immediately feel a "release" that will give you some relief. Saving a relationship means accepting that there are certain things you can change and certain things you can't. But the good news is you have more power than you may think.


If you're serious about learning how to save a relationship the first thing you must do is immediately stop any type of pushy, needy or "desperate" behavior. This includes arguing about the relationship, writing love letters, trying to convince your partner or ex, etc. The more you push, the more they will pull away... it's human nature. When you're the one chasing, you give away all your power... and that is unattractive.


The idea is to work with human nature instead of against it. You do this by giving the other person their space. If you are already broken up, this mean no contact for a while... no phone calls, emails, messages through mutual friends, nothing for at least a few weeks, even a month or so. If you are still together but the relationship is on the rocks, then of course zero contact is not practical. But giving your partner their space still applies.


By giving them their space, you show that you are no longer desperate and needy. You are no longer chasing them... and that will usually spark their interest again. Why? Because just like it's human nature to pull away if you feel pushed, the opposite is also true... a person tends to be drawn towards someone they think is not entirely available.


During this period of giving them their space, be sure to involve yourself in plenty of positive activities. Start working on those personal goals you've been putting off, do things that make you happy and improve your life. Your partner will see the difference. This combined with your new attitude of independence will almost always draw them towards you again. Now, instead of you being the one chasing, you're both equals... and you can begin to work on the deeper problems that need healing.


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